1. Name and describe the stages of relational de-escalation and what occurs at each of the stages, paying particular attention to communication behaviors at each stage.
2. How can the social exchange theory and relational dialectics theory be combined to predict the future of a relationship?
3. Define jealousy and identify, describe, and provide an example for the three different ways jealousy can manifest itself.
4. Identify the six phases of Duck’s model of ending relationships, and provide a description for each.
5. Describe the five sometimes overlapping stages of childhood friendships.
Relationships don’t always stay on a positive trajectory. Here are the stages of relational de-escalation and how communication changes:
Circumscribing: Partners try to force the relationship to work through excessive communication or activities. Communication becomes strained and efforts to maintain the relationship become the focus. (Ex: “We need to go to couples therapy” or constantly planning getaways)
Stagnation: The relationship stalls, with a lack of communication and intimacy. Partners may avoid conflict or difficult conversations. (Ex: Silent meals, minimal conversation, emotional withdrawal)
De-intensification: Emotional investment and commitment wane. Communication becomes blunt, negative, or passive-aggressive. (Ex: Sarcasm, criticism, negativity bias)
Social Withdrawal: Partners withdraw from social activities together and may begin spending more time with separate friends or alone. Communication becomes minimal and transactional. (Ex: Separate vacations, avoiding social events together)
Avoiding: Partners actively avoid each other and communication becomes nonexistent. (Ex: Sleeping in separate beds, not answering calls)
Termination: The relationship formally ends. Communication may be a final goodbye or a complete absence of contact. (Ex: Breaking up conversation, moving out)
Social Exchange Theory: This theory suggests people stay in relationships based on a cost-benefit analysis. If the rewards outweigh the costs, the relationship continues.
Relational Dialectics Theory: This theory proposes relationships navigate between three core dialectics: autonomy-connection, stability-change, and expression-privacy. Healthy relationships involve a balance between these opposing needs.
Combining these theories: By analyzing the costs-benefits (social exchange) and the ability to navigate the dialectics (relational dialectics), you can potentially predict a relationship’s future. For example, if costs outweigh benefits (social exchange) and the couple struggles to manage the dialectics, the relationship may be headed for trouble.
Important Note: These are just theories and don’t guarantee a specific outcome.
Jealousy is a complex emotion involving fear of losing something you value. Here are three types: