Defensive Communication
According to Zastrow and Hessenauer (2019), our perceptions determine how we interpret the messages we receive during communication. There are
several factors that can affect our perception, including defense mechanisms, which are socio-psychological factors that can influence what we perceive
and, in many cases, derail effective communication.
Before you write your initial discussion post, you should first review Chapter 5, Sections 2 and 3 in the textbook and review the defense mechanisms video.
For this forum, consider the following examples of defensiveness. Pick two of these examples and identify the defense mechanism at work, explain your
reasoning, then use Gibb’s analysis of defensive communication to explain how the defensiveness might be overcome.
A spouse refuses to speak to their partner because the partner was late for dinner and did not call.
A student tells their professor that it is the professor’s “fault” that they are on academic probation, which will “ruin their life.”
A parent tells her teen not to binge drink and the teen yells, “Who are you to judge me? You did the same thing when you were my age!”
An employer tells a recent college graduate that they know more because they went to the “school of hard knocks,” and “you think you’re better than the rest
of us—well, I’ve got news for you—you’re not! I’ve forgotten more than you will ever know about this business!”…
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Sample Solution
In this example, the spouse is exhibiting avoidance behavior as a defense mechanism. Avoidance behaviors are used when one individual wants to avoid any confrontation or difficulty and will refuse to engage in communication with the other person (Zastrow & Hessenauer, 2019). This could be an attempt for the spouse to gain control over their emotions or situation; by not engaging in communication, they can protect themselves from further hurt or disappointment.
Gibb’s analysis of defensive communication suggests that the best way to overcome this type of defensiveness is through active listening and validation. By validating how the spouse feels, it shows them that their perspective and experiences are being heard and respected. Active listening also allows both parties to explore why the event may have occurred and how it made them feel without feeling attacked by each other (Gibb’s Theory of Defensive Communication, nd.). In addition, understanding these feelings can help foster more open dialogue between both parties which can help lead towards solutions and compromise between them.
Another example is when someone refuses to talk about a difficult topic because they fear what others might think of them in text citation 300 words
In this example, the individual is displaying a form of anticipatory anxiety called “fear-of-the-unknown” as a defense mechanism (Zastrow & Hessenauer, 2019). Fear-of-the-unknown involves an individual being fearful about what might happen should they engage in conversation on a certain topic due to unknown outcomes or potential criticism from others who are involved (Zastrow & Hessenauer, 2019). This type of anticipatory anxiety helps protect individuals from potential hurtful situations as well as providing them with some security for their own self worth.
To overcome fear-of-the-unknown defensiveness Gibb’s theory states that empathy and understanding should be emphasized while also using nonjudgmental statements which do not accuse either party (Gibb’s Theory of Defensive Communication nd.). Empathizing shows that you understand where your partner is coming from while communicating nonjudgmentally communicates respect for all parties involved – no matter how different opinions my be. Utilizing these strategies encourages constructive dialogue instead of hostility which can help create better problem solving conversations than if one were just hostilely defending their point only for dominance purposes instead finding real solutions.
