“had to drink to fit in.”
According to Zastrow and Hessenauer (2019), our perceptions determine how we interpret the messages we receive during communication. There are
several factors that can affect our perception, including defense mechanisms, which are socio-psychological factors that can influence what we perceive
and, in many cases, derail effective communication.Identify the defense mechanism at work, explain your reasoning, then use Gibb’s analysis of defensive communication to explain how the defensiveness might be overcome.
A client in treatment for alcohol dependence tells the therapist that they got drunk because they were at a party and they “had to drink to fit in.” The client goes on to say, “One or two drinks isn’t going to kill me, so stop overreacting!!”
Sample Solution
The defense mechanism at work here is projection. This occurs when an individual is not willing to accept their own feelings and emotions, so they instead project them onto someone else (Zastrow & Hessenauer 2019). In this case, the individual being defensive is projecting their own feelings of guilt or inadequacy onto the other person in order to avoid having to acknowledge and deal with them.
In terms of overcoming this defensiveness, Gibb’s model suggests that the first step is for both parties to identify and recognize that a communication breakdown has occurred due to one or both of them becoming defensive (Gibb 1981). Once this has been established, it is important for both people involved to express understanding as well as acceptance for each other’s perspectives which should help reduce tensions between them (Gibb 1981). Finally, it would be beneficial for the defensive party to confront themselves directly about why they feel uncomfortable discussing certain topics by reflecting on what it says about them rather than blaming others. Through this process they can come up with more constructive ways of dealing with negative emotions while fostering healthier dialogue within their relationships.
Ultimately, these steps rely heavily on open communication which requires individuals to be honest with themselves as well as each other if any real progress is going to be made. However, if followed properly they should provide a framework through which productive conversations can occur even during times when tensions are high.