All business owners and executives have varying experiences and perspectives on the approach and qualities necessary for effective leadership. And not all situations require the same type of leadership style. I believe a great leader should possess a clear vision, be courageous, have integrity, honesty, humility and clear focus. Great leaders help people reach their goals, are not afraid to hire people that might be better than them and take pride in the accomplishments of those they help along the way. Great leaders adapt to their surrounding environments and empower the team to succeed together. Transformational leadership style inspire positive changes in those who follow. Transformational leaders are generally energetic, enthusiastic, and passionate.
What experiences have Lee and Charlie had with their primary caregiver that makes them deal with conflict in very different ways? Stern proposes four “domains of relatedness” (1985: 31-32) that assist in the formation of the sense of self. These are not phases of development but interrelated layers emerging over the first two years, complimenting one another (ibid.). The first domain, the emergent self, lasts until the second month. This is like an awakening, a realisation that ‘I am alive’ and with that comes a gradual awareness of the world through lived experiences (1985: 37 – 38).
Next is the domain of the core self and experiencing for the first time what it’s like interacting with another individual who’s able to regulate our physiological needs. The mother might be making funny faces when her baby smiles, soothing when it starts to fret or talking to it when it shows interest in a toy or her breast (Stern, 1985: 100 – 102). The infant learns to symbolise these interactions turning them into “lived episodes” that can be recalled when necessary (1985: 110). Stern calls these “Representations of Interactions that have been Generalised” (1985: 97).
“Whenever a RIG is activated, it packs some of the wallop of the originally lived experience in the form of an active memory” (Stern, 1985: 110).
This forms the heart of what it means to be with a self-regulating other and if that person is absent then “the infant encounters an evoked companion” (Stern, 1985: 111). This is a coping mechanism, a way for the infant to evoke what it’s like being with their mother (ibid.). Stern describes how the absent caregiver can be recalled once the caregiver has infused objects such as toys, almost liked it has personified them (1985: 122).
I can see the “evoked companion” (Stern, 1985: 111) coming alive whilst observing Lee. On this occasion he was enjoying playing with a ball that he brought into the nursery until he was told to put it back in his bag,
Lee doesn’t like this and says ‘No’ and his happy face changes to one of sadness. Abi says ‘ok you can play with the ball for 5 more minutes and then you’re going to have to put it away’. Lee’s f
